Brother Rat’s May Report

ratIn six days we set off for Convocation so I thought I had better start packing a bag. Well, I found one I thought might do and I was sitting on the couch with the bag busy deciding whether to pack a tasty Kiwi or some cheese or both when Helen found me.

“What are you doing?” She said.

“Packing my bag of course,” I replied.

“But you’re traveling baggage class and don’t get a luggage allowance.”

What! No luggage allowance? How can airlines be so mean, especially when baggage class also means no meals? I have to have some food with me or I shall starve on the Auckland – Los Angeles flight. How will I get food on the aircraft? Smuggle it under my habit and hope all those airport sniffer dogs don’t detect it?

Next year, or rather, later this month I am definitely going home with someone who can provide me with a quiet, warm, dry, dark closet which is full of subterfuge and I am going to stay in it all year. Maybe longer if I can prevent you from taking me to Convocation 2017. Any offers? Or will I have to kidnap the judges and decide the second place winner in the Juniper Cup myself???

About John Michael

Pastor, teacher, husband, dog walker, gardener, petrocollapse agitator, contemplative, hiker. Currently serving as a Formation Coordinator for OEF and Dean of VT/NY conference of Lutheran Synod.

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